Lawn Makeup aerosol spray, 10.5-oz. can; Global Star Products Ltd.-- The classic American fantasy of the perfectly manicured suburban lawn,
which already supports the fertilizer, sprinkler, mower, garden hose,
herbicide, and weed-whacker industries, has spawned another product: Lawn
Makeup, an aerosol spray manufactured in Canada. Lawn Makeup is sort of a
last resort, something to reach for if the fertilizer, the sprinkler, the
herbicide, and all the rest have failed you -- it's basically just a can of
green spray paint designed for use on patches of brown, scorched lawn.
Lawn Makeup, whose inventors were probably inspired by those
infomercials for the spray-on hair, has some very interesting features. My
can, the latest in a long series of excellent products sent by my
California field researcher Christine Wall, is marked, "Palm Green,"which
suggests there's a whole range of shades available. The can features
several other entertaining tidbits as well -- I'm particularly fond of the
boast that Lawn Makeup is "virtually non-toxic" (emphasis mine), as well
as the instructions to "spray a test area for color match," just like the directions on fabric dye packages.
But I shouldn't be so cynical. In the spirit of giving credit where it's
due, there's no denying that Lawn Makeup provides the answer to an age-old
question: If you've been wondering why the grass is always greener on the
other side of the fence, here's the probable explanation.
-- Global Star Products Ltd.; Toronto, Ontario, Canada.
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