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Industrial Designer Solves Problem of Social-Distancing Priests Baptizing Babies with Squirt Guns

Joshua Skirtich's 3:16 Magnum Baptism squirt gun

By Rain Noe - May 29, 2020

in Object Culture

How does a priest baptize a baby while adhering to social distancing? Industrial designer Joshua Skirtich observed the new trend of using squirt guns loaded with holy water.

It's obviously disturbing to see an adult pointing any type of firearm-like device at a baby. Skirtich came up with something far better. Here's his project:

3:16 Magnum (Product Name)

In the Catholic Church, infants are baptized to welcome them into the Catholic faith and to free them from the original sin they were born with. This is usually performed by a priest who douses the child's forehead with holy water (water that has been blessed by a member of the clergy.

Recently, Catholic priests began using squirt guns loaded with holy water to baptize from afar. Photos of these Covid-19 Baptisms showcase uniformed men holding vibrant, plastic, toys for what is normally a serious, sacred ceremony. I initially thought to redesign the gun as a joke, but later realized it as a serious opportunity to design a premium squirt gun - something that has never really had a reason to exist.

The gun's silhouette is a cross, the most important symbol of Christianity. The red cross floating in acrylic doubles as crosshairs (to aim with) and another nod to Christianity.

Three holes in the barrel signify " the father, the son, and the holy spirit," a doctrine used to explain the complex structure of God being three entities at once. During a baptism, the priest will say "I baptize you in the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit."

Well done, Skirtich!

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Comments

Fabio Castellanos

4 years ago

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Fun concept, but stay away from stating farce as fact.
A little more research would have revealed how impossible this would be to do officially.

"The photo was staged after the official ceremony was over. According to Deaton, the only water Jade came into contact with was of a divine nature."

https://www.tullahomanews.com/news/coronavirus_news/stick-em-up-baptism-goes-viral/article_ef38e4d0-a1bc-11ea-aaa4-17eae1576758.html

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Razvan Mitulescu

4 years ago

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Wow, such an elaborate joke! I'm in, just because we need to laugh from time to time. I even spent time to suggest something that will make it a bit more true to the it's intended ritual use. It's funny how the designer payed attention to the Christian dogma with those 3 squirting holes, dedicating one for each member of the Holly Trinity, but how he missed a very basic and simple twist that will render using this toy usable for the holly purpose of baptizing. As is, this still resembles very much to a gun directed to a baby.
I suggest a very simple, clean looking cross with a simple and almost invisible squirting hole in the center of the cross (cause 3 is 1, dogmatic teaching) and add a small flexible pump in the back, that sits invisible in the hand of the priest, so this device will just be a cross held like a priest holds a cross towards people, not hold like a gun.

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