"There are times when I want to sit down and have a conversation with somebody, but I don't want to face them, and I want us both to be hunched over. I used my design skills to make this happen."

"You can also place two of these together, and add this optional Ottoman that curves off to one side, for when you want to lie down in a funny position."

Not pictured: The barrel you place next to your toilet to store the extra rolls.

"Since you're already walking around while texting and not looking where you're going, let's add some hot coffee to the mix."

"I call it the Narcissistoaster. Be aware that lighter parts of the photo will translate to untoasted portions of bread, so for best results, fill the frame with your face and/or shoot against a dark background."

"As a designer, you ask the tough questions. I've always wondered 'How can I make the act of drinking coffee something that requires two triple-A batteries?' Then it hit me!"

According to the actual product description, this was designed to save your "achey arms" and "creaky neck" while watching a movie on your phone. Now you can transfer that tension to your jaw.

"I designed this for lefties who are easily fooled by poor Photoshop jobs with incorrect perspective." [True Story: While this is clearly fake, it's being sold here for $199.99.]

"Sure, it picks up a lot of dust and is tricky to clean, but you'll love that it takes twenty to thirty minutes to find your phone and remote controls in this thing."

"This double-level snack bowl is great! There's a slot in the back to hold your phone, a top level that holds shelled snacks, and a bottom level where you discard your hopes and dreams."