In the cereal biz, marketing pitches rarely deviate from some combination of health appeal (All-Bran, Total, Special K), youth appeal (Honey Comb, Count Chocula, the admirably timeless Kaboom), or comfort appeal (corn flakes, raisin bran). So I was surprised when my friend Heather gave me a box of President's Choice Ancient Grains, a reasonably tasty cereal whose cleverly subdued marketing premise makes a sneaky appeal to consumer guilt.

The pitch begins by establishing the cereal's historical pedigree. According to the box, the ancient grains referred to in the product name are spelt, millet, kamut, and quinoa. A note on the side panel then explains, "By supporting the use of these rare and ancient varieties of grains, you're encouraging the continued cultivation of these treasures from the past, which might otherwise be lost forever." This statement, despite its soothingly worded feel-good platitudes, is really a big finger designed to push the consumer's guilt button -- just as National Lampoon once threatened, "Buy this magazine or we'll shoot this dog," the President's Choice folks are essentially saying, "Buy this cereal or you ll have a slew of grain extinctions on your hands."
But are ancient grains really rare and endangered grains? In an effort to find out, I spoke with Larry Griffin, Vice President for Quality Assurance at Loblaw Brands, the Canadian company that markets the President's Choice line. He explained that the side-panel blurb has nothing to do with guilt appeal but is "more an attempt to explain to the consumer why one would even want to buy a cereal that contains grains that no one can pronounce." As for the whole extinction issue, Griffin readily acknowledged that millet is widely used outside of North America and "certainly is not on the endangered list." The information he faxed me about quinoa and kamut was interesting but did little to indicate whether either grain was on the verge of vanishing from terra firma. Nonetheless, he maintained his company's party line: "If we can perhaps create a larger marketplace for something that might otherwise be in trouble, we're happy to do so. If there aren't places for these grains to go, you and I both know what happens -- people stop growing them."
Well, maybe. But according to Charles Murphy, National Program Leader for Grain Crops at the U.S. Department of Agriculture s Agricultural Research Service, it isn't quite that simple. "The claim that eating this box of cereal is going to keep these grains from being lost to the world is a fellacious approach," he said. "I don t know of anything that would indicate that. There isn't anywhere near the quantity of, say, spelt grown for cereal as there is wheat or corn or whatever, but that doesn t mean it s endangered."
More to the point, as Murphy pointed out, President's Choice and their grain suppliers are hardly acting out of altruism. "Obviously, someone is growing these things commercially," he explained. "Whoever's growing these things, they're not in the business of of preserving seeds or species diversity -- they re looking to make a profit growing a crop."
All of which is fine by me -- it's just business, after all -- but I wish they weren't so damn sanctimonious about it. Turns out that the big "PC" on the Ancient Grains box doesn't stand for "President's Choice" -- it s for "politically correct." (Loblaw Brands, Ltd., 22 St. Clair Ave. East, Toronto, Ontario, M4T 2S8)
Readers looking to stay caught up on all things consumptive may be interested in Beer Frame: The Journal of Inconspicuous Consumption. The new issue includes product reviews that have run on this site over the past five months, plus an assortement of related material.