Just released: The "Lomme Design Platform" bed, and it doesn't get any fresher than this--their website went live like, fifteen minutes ago.

According to the product copy, "Owners of Lomme beds will benefit from state of the art light and sound therapy, which remove outside disturbances and allow you to wake naturally feeling refreshed and full of energy." Unfortunately it doesn't say what this light and sound therapy consists of; perhaps the copywriters were too tired from testing the bed out to elaborate.

The copy also points out that "the egg shaped design gives you comfort and protection," presumably from large, carnivorous birds.

The bed is interesting-looking for sure, but single males may want to think twice about springing for one--if you bring a woman back to your place and she sees this thing, chances are you'll be having breakfast without her. For maximum irony, have eggs.